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Qualities of an ideal husband / wife

 

An ideal wife or husband would be a person who is an ideal companion. Does it appear that I am running around in circles ? I hope it does not. Though the traditional role of a husband is different from that of a wife, the qualities of a person are not sex-oriented, they are person-oriented. What do I want in the person I marry ? My list may be a long one: but it is sound in its priorities. I want the man I choose as a husband to be generous, to have a sense of humor and to be trusting and trustworthy. I would like to build our relationship on affection and respect and on complete frankness. A tall order ? Let me explain myself.

Affection and respect put together are the essence of love. They are more durable than the euphoria of romantic love linked to physical attraction. It is true that beauty contributes a great deal towards life's pleasantness, but unreflecting, unthinking beauty has nothing to recommend itself. What is perhaps welcome is a general smartness of behavior and looks, but there may be cases when this is also shelved to the background. Respect in a relationship is very important, and note I mean respect, not awe or fear or any other feeling but respect which includes self-respect and can be stretched a long way to cover the crevices of feelings.

I would like my future husband to be frank with me and to discuss financial, emotional and other problems with me. For if there is any ground on which I cannot tread, or any occasion when I find the door closed against me, or any time when whispered conversations take place, or papers and letters are kept away, or I look askance and don't get a reply, then there lies the beginning of distrust and rift. A marriage is a companionship; it extends into old age and can mature into a relationship where words need not be exchanged and still complete understanding may exist. It is a relationship which cannot be built on lies or half-truths. When I use the word 'frank' I do not only mean emotional friendships though they too are included. Is it not more graceful that my friends of the days when I was not yet married be known to my husband than that I spring a surprise on him or leave him to work his imagination in different directions ? Similarly I would like to know about my husband's friends - men and women. Frankness should extend to all money matters. I should know (and so should he) what our economic position is.

A marriage is the basis of a family; it grows and matures and strengthens over the years. It cannot do so when the partners concerned pull in different directions. A home is a place where one feels there should be no uneasiness, no appearances to maintain, where one should feel free to express oneself and be one's own true self. This is possible if there is some basic generosity in the members of the family for generosity backs up the desire to understand, to be less critical and more forgiving in one's approach.

Don't you know that a grim man is stern and unforgiving ? There are numerous little problems which can be laughed away. At times this capacity to take things lightly, to see the funny side of an otherwise grim situation may cement a relationship much more than anything else. Laughter keeps one young. It is the best medicine. So let's live and laugh together.

     
     
     
     
     
     
     
 
 
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High School English essays 1

 
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