|
Maggie : Can you
eighty-six Sprout? He's licking up
all the petroleum distillates I'm trying to put in.
Cindy : Oh, sorry. She's an
obedience school
dropout.
Maggie : Have a seat.
Man : Thank you. We'll see you, ladies and gentlemen,
in the hotel on the weekend.
Peggy : You're a goddess. You're a goddess!
Ika : Shazam!
I think I'm in Mayberry.
Maggie : I didn't have to change a gasket, just put
in new hydraulic fluid.
Peggy : Stop it! When you talk like that, it turns me
on and frightens me.
Maggie : Oh, you turn a
girl's head.
Peggy : Whoa!
Ika : Excuse me. Hello? Excuse me. Could you
help -- I'm looking for Maggie Carpenter. There was a,
uh, note on the door of the hardware store across
the street.
Peggy : Are you a reporter ?
Ika : What ?
Peggy : It's just been our experience that anyone who
comes in here with tassels on his
loafers is a
big-city reporter wanting to do an interview with
Maggie.
Ika : About her upcoming wedding and all.
Peggy : Actually about her getting that asshole from
New York fired.
Ika : I am just such a reporter. And who are you ?
Peggy : Peggy Flemming. Not the ice skater. Come in,
come in.
Ike : Thank you. Who are these lovely ladies?
Cindy : Hi. I'm Cindy. Maggie's unmarried cousin.
Mrs. Pressman : Mrs. Pressman.
No relation. Oh,
sorry.
Peggy : And you are ?
Ika : Looking... for Maggie.
Peggy : Maggie, someone to see you.
Maggie : I hope you've got a new angle because it's
all pretty much been covered.
Peggy : Hold on. No one interviews Maggie in here
without a haircut.
Ika : Sorry, no. Just got one.
Mrs. Pressman : Excuse me, sir, I have a fact for
you. An actual fact.
Ika : Yes, Mrs. Pressman ?
Mrs. Pressman : You know, this is actually her fourth
wedding, not her seventh like they said.
Ike : I know. Tell me something. Do you think she's
gonna make it all the way this time ?
Mrs. Pressman : I don't know.
Maggie : She swallowed her gum. She does that.
Mrs. Pressman : Mr. Schulian, he runs the newsstand.
He's also our local bookie.
He's given eight-to-one odds
that she won't.
Ika : Okay.
Maggie : Instead of a haircut, how 'bout a wash? Get
all that city grit out of your hair.
Ika : You'll answer my questions?
Maggie & Peggy : Mm-hmm.
Ika : Fine! You wash, I'll ask. |
