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Alex 'Hitch' Hitchens : Basic principles: No woman
wakes up saying: "God, I hope I don't get
swept off my
feet today." Now, she might
say, "This is a really
bad time
for me." Or something like, "I
just need some space." Or my
personal favorite: "I'm really
into my career
right now." You believe that? Neither does
she. You know why? Because she's lying to
you, that's why. You understand me? Lying.
It's not a bad time for her. She doesn't
need any space. She may be into her career,
but what she's really saying is, "Get away
from me now." Or possibly, "Try harder,
stupid." Well, which one is it? 60% of all
human communication is nonverbal. Body
language. 30% is your tone. So that means
that 90% of what you're saying ain't coming
out of your mouth.
Woman : Toby! Toby! Shit!
Alex 'Hitch' Hitchens : Of course she gonna lie to
you. She's a nice person, she doesn't wanna
hurt your feelings. What else is she gonna
say? She doesn't even know you. Yet.
Luckily, the fact is that just like the rest
of us even a beautiful woman doesn't know
what she wants until she sees it. And that's
where I come in. My job is to open her eyes.
Woman : Toby! Oh, my God!
Man :
Is this what you're looking for?
Alex 'Hitch' Hitchens : Basic principles: No
matter what, no matter when, no matter who,
any man has a chance to sweep any woman off
her feet. Just needs the right broom. You
cannot use what you do not have. So if
you're shy, be shy. If you're outgoing, be
outgoing.
Man :
I'm not outgoing.
Alex 'Hitch' Hitchens : That's okay. She may not
want the whole truth, but she does want the
real you. She may not want to see it all at
once, but she does want to see it. So
tonight, when you're wondering what to say,
how you look, whether or not she likes you,
just remember, she is already out with you.
That means she said yes-
Man :
When she could have said no.
Alex 'Hitch' Hitchens : That means she made a plan
when she could have just
blown you off.
So that means it is no longer your job to
try to make her like you. It is your job not
to mess it up. The shoes are hot. You went
to the place I told you, right?
Man :
Yeah, but I don't think they're really me.
Alex 'Hitch' Hitchens : "You" is a very fluid
concept right now. You bought the shoes. You
look great in the shoes. That's the you I'm
talking about. The key tonight is
hang back.
Give her plenty of space. If she lingers at
a photograph, move on. But maintain the
visual. All right now, supposed to be 64 and
clear tonight. So when you leave the club,
walk a little. Ask her what she thought
about the show, what was her favorite
photograph, why that one. And when she
answers, don't be looking at her mouth.
Don't be wondering what she looks like
naked. Listen to what she is saying and
respond.
Man :
Listen and respond. Listen and respond.
Alex 'Hitch' Hitchens : That way, when it's your
turn to talk, you'll have something better
to say than, "I like your mouth."
Woman : What was your favorite one?
Man :
The elephant, definitely. Yeah.
Alex 'Hitch' Hitchens : And all of a sudden, we're
on date number two.
Woman : Ready. No way. We're going back in
there. You have to smile.
Alex 'Hitch' Hitchens : In case you didn't go to
high school,
hitting is a good thing. So
how does it happen, great love?
Man :
Are you okay?
Alex 'Hitch' Hitchens : Nobody knows.
Woman : I'm good.
Man :
Let me get a Bomb Pop and a Screwball for
the lady.
Alex 'Hitch' Hitchens : But what I can tell you,
is that it happens in the
blink of an eye. One moment,
you're enjoying your life. And the next,
you're wondering how you ever lived without
them. Three dates is all I need. Three
dates, and I'll get you here, to the
high-stakes medal round
where eight out of 10 women believe that the
first kiss will tell them everything they
need to know about the relationship. After
that, you're on your own. But always
remember: Life is not
the amount of breaths you take. It's the
moments that take your breath away. |
