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Ross: A thumb?!
(Phoebe nods.)
All: Eww!
Phoebe: I know! I know,
I opened it up and there it was, just floating in there, like this tiny
little hitch-hiker!
Chandler: Well, maybe it's a contest,
y'know? Like, collect all five?
Phoebe: Does, um, anyone wanna see?
All: Nooo!
(Chandler lights a cigarette.)
All: Oh, hey, don't do that! Cut it out!
Rachel: It's worse than the thumb!
Chandler: Hey, this is so unfair!
Monica: Oh, why is it unfair?
Chandler:So I have a flaw! Big deal!
Like Joey's constant knuckle-cracking isn't annoying?
And Ross, with his over-pronouncing every single word? And Monica, with that snort when she laughs? I
mean, what the hell is that thing? ...I accept all those flaws, why can't you
accept me for this?
(An awkward silence ensues.)
Joey: ...Does the knuckle-cracking bother everybody?
Rachel: Well, I-I could live without it.
Joey: Well, is it, like, a little annoying, or is it like when
Phoebe chews her hair?
(Phoebe spits out her hair.)
Ross: Oh, now, don't listen to him, Pheebs, I think it's
endearing.
Joey: Oh, (Imitating Ross) "you do, do you"?
(Monica laughs and snorts.)
Ross: You know, there's nothing wrong with speaking correctly.
Rachel: "Indeed there isn't"... I should really get back to
work.
Phoebe: Yeah, 'cause otherwise someone might get what they
actually ordered.
Rachel: Ohh-ho-hooohhh.
The hair comes out, and the gloves come on.
(They degenerate into bickering and Chandler happily starts to smoke,
undisturbed.)
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